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- The Moment Pressure Decides for You (Before You Even Walk In)
The Moment Pressure Decides for You (Before You Even Walk In)
Pressure doesn’t hijack you in the moment.
Most people think they lose control during pressure.
They don’t.
By the time your chest tightens.
By the time your mind goes blank.
By the time you feel defensive, rushed, or suddenly “off”…
Your nervous system has already decided how this moment will go.
And that’s the part almost no one talks about.
Pressure Isn’t the Problem — Prediction Is
We like to believe pressure hijacks us in the moment.
It doesn’t.
Pressure works earlier. Quietly. Automatically.
Long before you walk into the meeting, open your mouth, or sit down for the conversation, your nervous system is already running predictions:
What’s at stake here?
What will it mean if I mess this up?
How exposed am I?
What does failure say about me?
Once those questions start running, your system prepares accordingly.
That preparation — not the pressure itself — is what causes shutdown, defensiveness, or mental fog.
The Load You Don’t Realize You’re Carrying
I call this anticipatory load.
It’s the mental and physiological weight you carry into pressure.
Most people walk into high-stakes situations already overloaded because they’re:
Rehearsing what to say
Monitoring how they’ll be perceived
Mentally arguing with people who aren’t even in the room
Trying to protect their identity, credibility, or confidence
So when pressure finally shows up, the system doesn’t suddenly collapse.
It finally gives out.
The shutdown feels sudden.
But the collapse started much earlier.
Why “Preparing More” Usually Makes It Worse
Here’s the uncomfortable truth.
Most preparation increases anticipatory load.
Over-rehearsing language.
Trying to lock in confidence.
Running worst-case scenarios.
Mentally proving yourself right.
To your nervous system, that doesn’t signal readiness.
It signals threat.
“This must be dangerous if we’re working this hard to control it.”
So the system tightens. Narrows. Goes into safety mode.
That’s not performance readiness.
That’s defense.
The Shift High Performers Make (That Changes Everything)
High performers don’t eliminate anticipation.
They change what their system is preparing for.
Let’s make this real.
A high-stakes meeting.
Most people prepare to:
Say the right thing
Be seen as competent
Avoid looking wrong
That preparation loads the system with personal risk.
Now here’s the shift.
High performers prepare for responsiveness, not performance.
The internal signal becomes:
“This isn’t about me.
I need to stay oriented and respond to what’s actually happening.”
Instead of preparing how to perform, they prepare how to:
Move the conversation forward
Align the room
Resolve the issue
Ask better questions
Share the weight of the moment instead of carrying it alone
When you take yourself out of the center of the moment, your nervous system stops bracing.
Because it’s no longer protecting you —
it’s supporting the outcome.
That single shift reduces anticipatory load before pressure ever arrives.
And when pressure hits?
Clarity is still available.
The Question That Changes Performance Under Pressure
If pressure keeps hijacking you, stop asking:
“How do I stay calm in the moment?”
And start asking:
What is my system preparing to defend?
Why am I getting defensive?
Where did I make this about me?
Control under pressure isn’t built at the peak.
It’s decided before you ever arrive.
And yes — taking yourself out of it is hard.
But it’s necessary.
Want the full breakdown?
I walk through this step-by-step in my latest video, including exactly how this shows up in real meetings and conversations.
Watch here: https://youtu.be/NTfmb5Of_Ac
If this landed, share it with someone who lives under pressure — and if you’re not subscribed yet, now’s a good time. There’s a lot more coming.
— Jennifer
Three things to ALWAYS remember:
Be CONFIDENT!
Be EMPATHETIC!
AND ALWAYS HAVE PASSION!!!!
